Kyle and Jackie Naught adds John Laws to the team

After a sensational appearance on 7:30 the other night, the old king of the broadcast beasts, John Laws, has almost stolen headlines from Alan Jones. He was certainly newsworthy enough for 2Day’s Kyle and Jackie O to put in call. Kyle even dressed up like him for the occasion.

 Kyle: I heard all the hoo haa about you being on TV… I thought you were well dressed…

Jackie O: People have been making fun of you haven’t they John?

John Laws: They’ve been making fun of me for about 50 years so it doesn’t bother me…I was very impressed with your outfit, I’m so flattered, you’ve copied my golden microphone, you’ve copied my car and now you’ve copied my clothes.

Jackie O: It’s true John he is copying a lot of what you do.


Kyle: I started my career up in Townsville pushing your buttons, you are the reason why I am here.

John Laws:
 I am delighted… what I want you to do is try and think of something new Kyle.

Jackie O: You do something that John can copy.

Kyle: Here’s one for you, why don’t you get a mass amount of listeners like I do.

John Laws: I am national, I am international…



Kyle: We’re national as well…


John Laws: Well are you international?  We go out there on that facebook thing and calls from Singapore…

Jackie O: We get that as well.

John Laws:
 Oh Jackie ‘nought’!

Jackie O: 
I’ve heard you call me that before, I’m very amused by that. Most people are (international) with that facebook thing, it makes you international.

John Laws: You’ve probabely got miles more listeners than me, pity you haven’t got miles more talent. I like Jackie ‘nought’ I like feminine women who just know their place in the world.


Kyle: You can flip from nice as pie to poisonous tongue in a second. 


John Laws: I have no idea where you’ve been putting it.

Kyle: I’ve got lots of pictures of you round my desk… people think I’m fascinated.


John Laws:

Kyle: … what are you doing later?

Jackie O:
Have you two ever caught up?

Kyle:
He doesn’t want to be seen with me.  I don’t know what we’d talk about.

John Laws: Well I know, we’d talk about you, it’s all you ever talk about.


Kyle: People were saying on Twitter that you look like some sort of villain from an Austin Powers video… I think you’re impeccably dressed.  Always well presented…

John Laws: People can’t help how they look…


Kyle: 
I can, I could probably lose 30 kilos.

John Laws: I haven’t seen you for a while are you overweight…

Kyle: Massively.

John Laws: Really well you eat too much.


Kyle: It’s mainly just bread and milk.



John Laws: What institution are you staying in at the moment?  I like Jackie ‘nought; I like feminie women who know their place in the world.


Jackie O: Oh John you don’t know me then… Give me a day with you and I’ll give you some fun.


John Laws: Why don’t you come over one morning and do the program with me, I won’t pay you.  
Jackie, are you wearing a dress? 


Jackie O: Yes.

John Laws: Oh good! I tell you what the three of us should do, we should club in and buy a radio station.

Kyle: I’m in. Let’s buy Nova, they’re not worth anything… we’ll buy it.


John Laws: 2UE would be a half a chance but I’m not sure where it is now… over the horizon, like most of its presenters.


Kyle: I wish you were my father.


John Laws: I’m not old enough, he said very coldly!  Why have you got to go?

Kyle: We’re supposed to be finished on air at nine, it’s quarter to ten and we’re still here.


John Laws: The three of us should have lunch one day.  I’m not going to that joint you go to.


Kyle: Sienna?

Jackie O:
 Are you still down at Otto are you?

John Laws: I musn’t be rude about your restaurant, Daniel asked me to go there, I said I can’t go there, Kyle and Jackie ‘nought’ go there.

Jackie O: 
Oh John, it never gets old.


John Laws: We’ll go to yours, you’ve got to organise it.

Jackie O: I’ll organise it… have a good day!

Kyle: You can’t wrap up an icon!  Is there enough room for both the (Rolls Royce) down there?



Jackie O: Or the egos…Hey John, what motor oil are you using these days?

John Laws: Valvoline, you know what I mean!